Thursday, March 20, 2014

Hello there....

I don't know who I'm writing to.

Maybe I'll write a book like my therapist says that I should. Well, this definitely isn't a book and I think that I'm just going to write about what I feel like writing about.

I don't think that anyone will read this.

I'm a person who has a couple (well, more than a couple...) people inside of her. I was first diagnosed with Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (DDNOS), and later was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID).

Sometimes, it is the worst thing I can imagine. And sometimes it isn't so bad. Sometimes, I actually having them in my life.

I've been in intensive therapy since May (but I have been in therapy long before that). 15 hours a week, I sit my butt in a chair in various people's office. I do EMDR, art therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, sand trays, hypnosis, and a lot of talking. It has helped more than I can even express, but I'm not to where I want to be yet. I'll be working on that for quite a while.

My therapist, Karen, says I need to create a structured day plan Sunday through Sunday, and it is within this structure that I may find my life. She says occasionally things will pop up that interfere with my plans, like you know, life, and I will deal with them moment by moment. Doesn't she know that I am not good with time?